new year. new spirit.

Aaaaa it’s new year everyone!!it’s January 2011. I love January. it’s my favorite month beside December, because my birthday is in January. Hihiiiiiiiy.

Last night, before i went to sleep, i looked at myself back in 2010. Sometimes, i just couldn’t believe that i succesfully through everything that happened for a year. Let me name it, my most tough moment in 2010.

1. got over a heartbreak

2. made my minor thesis,

3. got depressed because of my minor thesis,

4. fell in love with the least expected person,

5. went through my minor thesis hearing

6. got over a heartbreak AGAIN

7. driving tuition

8. finding a job

9. quarter life crisis

10. dealt with people in my office

those are some of my problem which i thought i would never get through. but a year later, which means right now, i could see myself here, a different person than who i was a year ago. Heartbreak and heartache did leave scars everywhere but i wear those scars as my trophies for winning a lot of battles. Driving tuition taught me to face my fear. Errrr actually i’m still a person who easily scared of something, it’s like i fear of many things. And i often over freaked-out. think i should work on that issue. Okay move on. Then, Quarter life crisis was kinda real tough for me, i spent every night crying for something i didn’t know. But i thank God i got over it, and quarter life crisis taught me to understand myself more. I mean all this time, myself was such the last thing i would try to understand. I always try to please everyone, i always try to understand everyone, but i never thought that i need to understand and please myself too. And i learnt that understand yourself is really important so you can choose your own future path and your purpose in life. Anw, i haven’t found my passion and my purpose in life. Well then, face my fear and find my purpose in life are two things i should work on this new year. but please i don’t wanna be in Quarter life crisis phase again. it is rough!!

I embrace this new year with new spirit, new hope, new wishes, new guy (ngarepbangetdotcom) and new me. i hope i can figure out my purpose in life, i hope i can be less worry about everything, i hope i can reach my dreams and makes me proud of myself. i think i should proud of myself before other people does. I might didn’t win some competition or graduated as the Suma Cum Laude student , but i did win a lot of battles in my life. I tried so hard to graduate, i tried so hard to get a job, i tried so hard to deal with new people with many different personalities in my life. Though i still work on it, but i feel proud of myself.

Note to myself : i have to accept somethings that don’t work according to my plan with a big heart. Never stop to learn and never stop to chase my dream.

Never lose faith. never give up, people.

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